Tuesday, August 26, 2008

As I plummet through the burning wreckage, will I regret avoiding Memphis?

Today I booked my trip to Hungary. As so often happens, the choices on Orbitz I had a week ago are now more limited and more expensive.

The logistics go like this:
I have this thing when I travel internationally: I always try to avoid Airlines That May Piss Off The Terrorists. This includes the major U.S. Airlines (which include Airlines That Piss Me Off) as well as British Airways, the UK being such a U.S. pal. It's kind of like deciding whom to sit with at the high school cafeteria, knowing that the wrong associations spell social doom.

I need to be in Hungary for 10 days, including weekends, to have the abutment for my implants made. To fit in with SP and AN's schedules and to accommodate my own vacation time (I'm also increasingly paranoid about leaving my aging animals now), I have to start the process on a particular Friday.

After an hour of searching various sites, I have the following options:

  • The flight is expensive but within my budget, but the first, overseas, leg, is United. No.
  • The flight is all Dutch or German carrier, but to get there on time for the appointment will cost me over $300 more, unless I fly a day earlier and go through either Minneapolis or Memphis to Amsterdam or Frankfurt, then to Hungary. No.
  • If I take the flight that matches all my criteria, I arrive at 2pm on the Friday, which is the day I want to have the appointment. Doable, but let's remember I'm flying out of O'Hare, where Departure/Arrival times are suggestions only, and a delay of a couple of hours means I lose three days in Hungary that have to be made up. No.

So in the end I'm flying United to Frankfurt (you know, where they bomb discos popular with U.S. GIs, and where the bomb that took down the PanAm flight over Lockerbie was put on the plane?)

These teeth had better be freaking GORGEOUS.


SP said...

Well, luckily PanAm went out of business, so you should be alright.

Anonymous said...

I'm confused! Did I miss a post explaining this tooth adventure in more detail?

JC said...

Yes, because United's never been involved in a major act of terrorism.

Oh wait.

JC said...


It catos $6K to put implant sin my jaw. They wanted another $6K to put the crowns on that. I said no freaking way. Turns out there's a prosperopus little business being done in Hungary addressing the detnal needs of Western Europeans and Americans. Doctors fluent in all the major languages and using the saem materials as they do here will take care of me. The entire trip, including the procedure, will be under $3K. Let's review: Here, $6K gets me teeth. There, $3K gets me teeth and a week's overseas adventure.

You do the math.

SP said...

Only if you do the spelling.

JC said...

You know what you are? You're two things:

Smug and German.

Or is that just one thing?