Tuesday, October 16, 2007

This is HOT, Baby.

So when I took out personals ads on green dating sites I envisioned strapping, would-be farmers, robust vegetarian lads with dogs, and cabins in the woods.

In reality, the only thing that breaks the echoing emptiness of my personals mailboxes is the occasional email from unsuitable men much older than me, such as the latest, a man who explains that he does not share my love of flannel because it gets caught in his body hair.

8 comments:

SP said...

Yeah, but maybe you should talk to them first and get to know their personality, share in their intelligence, etc. before making judgments of what they are like based on their appearance.

SP said...

Oh, and I do recommend Light Stream laser treatment. Best thing since Wonderbread.

Dave P said...

Hmmm - what's the word I'm looking for... Oh, yeah -

Eeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

dp

JC said...

Oh, you've been spared the photo. Complete with hand puppets.

JC said...

"before making judgments of what they are like based on their appearance."

While I am much more personality- than looks-driven, a bushy beard and mustache is a deal breaker. To put it delicately, there are things this girl enjoys that are not enhanced by a rough, scratchy beard.

JC said...

Oh, oh, oh, the best part? After I responded and thanked him for his email, I explained that I am not interested in a long-distance relationship (he lives several states away). He responded that distance isn't a problem, because he'd be willing to relocate if we click.

So I'm saying that distance is a problem for me, to which he replies that distance isn't actually a problem because HE doesn't have a problem with it.

The really irritating part is that it's this unbelievable self-centeredness that characterizes almost all of the single men I know. Cripes, make them all just go away!

SP said...

You are so superficial. It pains me to see it.

JC said...

Yeah, that's me. Miss Shallow. Trying to find someone who shares my values amidst a sea of men whose main "soulmate" criteria are that their playmates be 10 years younger and have big tits.